So drunk its hurt
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
