Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
