real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Randomize
