My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He passed out mid-signature
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
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