The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I could have mohawked her pubes.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
sex in a hospital.. check
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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