yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.