I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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