Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
17 year olds will be the death of me.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
