Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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