Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore

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  (248): Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore http://tfl.nu/16rg
  Replies (38) Good night (1306) Bad night (2153) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on

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  (214): Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on http://tfl.nu/x4zw
  Replies (11) Good night (858) Bad night (963) Order T-Shirt
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.

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  (208): I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to. http://tfl.nu/m80m
  Replies (24) Good night (2120) Bad night (496) Order T-Shirt
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"

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  (501): I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay (602): I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay" http://tfl.nu/cfbv
  Replies (20) Good night (3972) Bad night (713)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.

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  (810): kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking. http://tfl.nu/av4y
  Replies (34) Good night (8760) Bad night (696)
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  (562): View more from California

  he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...

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  (562): he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out... http://tfl.nu/eghd
  Replies (62) Good night (607) Bad night (8136) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.

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  (973): UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to. http://tfl.nu/mbqt
  Replies (26) Good night (5692) Bad night (1105)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.

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  (717): dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high. http://tfl.nu/gyij
  Replies (20) Good night (5919) Bad night (1146) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had

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  (902): you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had http://tfl.nu/lpp3
  Replies (9) Good night (3314) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.

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  (201): Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys. http://tfl.nu/w09r
  Replies (8) Good night (1895) Bad night (680) Order T-Shirt
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  3pm strippers are depressing

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  (320): 3pm strippers are depressing http://tfl.nu/w12t
  Replies (19) Good night (754) Bad night (1736) Order T-Shirt
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."

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  (606): I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening." http://tfl.nu/f5c0
  Replies (3) Good night (1343) Bad night (381)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.

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  (970): The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless. http://tfl.nu/oac7
  Replies (5) Good night (879) Bad night (322) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.

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  (917): Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am. http://tfl.nu/94x6
  Replies (2) Good night (1195) Bad night (400)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.

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  (443): well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud. http://tfl.nu/je7g
  Replies (2) Good night (1551) Bad night (526)

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