everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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