But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize