it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
