Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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