Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
