she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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