well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
