the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
