This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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