I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
