You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
My vagina just clenched in fear
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
