no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
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