Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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