i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
