he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
