so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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