Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
