This girl is more easily done than said...
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
