Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
