How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
