shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
