i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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