On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
