at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
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i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
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Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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