Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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