No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
