Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize