i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
