New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
