You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize