oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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