Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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