..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.