I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I just said "you do you" to my penis.