I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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