I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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