Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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