The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
