Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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