i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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