I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
last night I used snow as a chaser
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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