why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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