I think i peed on brittanys purse
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
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